ILLUMINAE // Hold Me, I'm in Love

Warning: As always, I try to stay relatively spoiler free. But it doesn’t hurt to proceed with caution. 

Rating: Five Stars—ajklsdflk (when words fail to describe how wonderful a book is)

Okay, okay, I think I’m in love. This book was AMAZING. And I don’t say that lightly. I know that, as far as book bloggers go, I am very easy to please and I probably give out way more five-star ratings than I should if I want people to take my judgment on bookish matters seriously. But I would give this book eleven stars if I could. 

In a nutshell, ILLUMINAE follows Kady and Ezra as they escape the destruction of an illegal mining colony by hitching a ride with the Alexander and her fleet. However, the company that attacked the mining colony, unwilling to let any witnesses survive, pursues the fleeing ships for months. Matters worsen when a strange illness breaks out on one of the ships and the malfunctioning Artificial Intelligence takes drastic measures to prevent its spread. 

But the story is much much more than that, so obviously I need to explain to you why I love this book so much I would pry it out of the hands of a crying baby if I had to (haha, ahem, just kidding—I would never be that mean to a baby…probably). 

AIDEN. I. Am. In. Love. With. AIDEN. Although he is a computer (AIDEN stands for Artificial Intelligence Defense Analytics Network), he is more than just an amalgamation of algorithms and code. Whether it is his programing or his damaged hardware, his thought processes transcend binary into poetry. There is something so tragic and pathetic about the way he falls for Kady. Actually, there’s something so tragic and pathetic about the way he processes the world in general. (And when I say pathetic, I’m speaking in terms of pathos rather than ridiculousness.) He may be one of the main antagonists, but he does not see himself as an aggressor. Always he tries to act in the best interests of the majority, and he constantly justifies and evaluates his decisions. His programing may be cold and sterile, supposedly devoid of human feeling, but there is still something so distinctly moving when he asks himself, “Am I not merciful?” 

His thoughts, both in wording and presentation, are works of art, and I daresay he is more human in the end than most of the humans on the Alexander. I think he is, hands down, one of my favorite characters of ever, and I will probably talk about him so much over the coming year that you will want to duct tape my mouth shut and throw me out the airlock before the end of it. Sorry, not sorry. 

Phobos. I actually felt a little misled here because one of the blurbs on the jacket mentioned zombies and I was like, “Ooh, yay, zombies.” Except they aren’t zombies, not really. Granted, the people effected by the virus behave a bit like the zombies in The Walking Dead in that they are attracted by sound. But Phobos victims are basically just uber psychotic people. Extremely terrifying, extremely violent, extremely psychotic people. And they are far scarier and far more dangerous than mere zombies. So I’m totally not disappointed. 

As Phobos progresses through their systems, they become increasingly unreasonable, paranoid, and violent. But they retain enough of their intelligence and enough of their humanity to make them far worse—more awful and more tragic. And if you've read the book, you’ll understand why I will always fight panic every time I hear someone say, “Don’t look at me.” There is probably something really deep and symbolic about the Phobos victims’ behavior, but I’m far too busy donning my hazmat suit and barricading myself in my closet to analyze this aspect of the book any further. 

Kady and Ezra. The story literally begins on the day Kady and Ezra break up. (Talk about poor timing.) And it’s fascinating to see where they go from there—how the tumultuous circumstances affect their strained relationship, and how the big, awful things around them help the two to see the small, awful things they have done to each other along the way. Normally I’m not a huge fan of romance, but when it comes to Kady and Ezra—yeah, I ship it. 

Also, Kady is a skilled hacker with more than her fair share of sass, and I want to be her when I grow up. 

Unique Format. As much as I was excited about the formatting of the novel, I was a little dubious for first the first two hundred pages or so. Maybe I was reading too quickly. Maybe it was that the narrative just felt a little different, like I was on the outside looking in. But I struggled to ground myself in the characters’ heads, and there were times I felt a little vague on the technicalities of the action, like maybe I had missed something important. (I sometimes feel this way when I’m reading books in French—I understand French, but it’s also not my mother tongue, so there’s a bit of a mental lag.) 

Despite my initial mild confusion, I did find myself getting more and more and MORE invested as the story progressed. Now, having finished the book, I can tell you I am entirely sold on this form of storytelling. It’s not something I would read all the time because I’m fairly certain most authors couldn’t pull it off. It’s also a style that doesn’t lend itself to every story idea out there. But in this case, I don’t think any other method would have fit ILLUMINAE quite so well—any other form of narration would have robbed the climax of its power. 

Woes and Whatnot. Nevertheless, I did have some qualms about ILLUMINAE. 

First of all, this book is censored. All the major swear words are blacked out as a part of the story. And I like what that says about the culture in ILLUMINAE, that awful things can happen and violence can be presented, but God forbid we cuss. On top of that, it’s also an excellent example of the way censorship backfires. Blacking out or not, there was never a moment where I was unclear what the intended swear word was. Blacking out the vulgar words only draws the eye and the mind to them, thus completely defeating the point. 

Or maybe that was the point. 

That being said, there was a good deal of swearing in ILLUMINAE, and while strong swearing doesn’t generally bother me enough to make me stop reading, it does make me a little more squeamish about recommending the book to just anyone and everyone. I would rather not sully the virgin minds of innocent younglings. ILLUMINAE also packs a significant amount of innuendo and general crassness. To be perfectly honest, I was planning to give this book a lower star rating for that very purpose because I think the story could have been told just as effectively with significantly less swearing and innuendo. When I give a book five stars, I see it as my giant stamp of approval—that I will shove this book in the face of anyone who listens. But I also want to be responsible about the books I shove into people’s faces. Which explains why I was initially hesitant. 

The Ending. "So, why did you give ILLUMINAE five stars if you're such a grandma about the language?" 

I’m glad you asked that question. 

I loved the ending. I loved the ending so much I almost cried because it was so beautiful. And I am not the type of person to get emotional over beauty, at all. I just don’t. But there are no words for how wonderful the ending was. I know that people often say something like, “This story took my breath away,” and they generally mean that as a figure of speech. So let me clarify. I literally had to keep reminding myself to breathe for the last two hundred pages or so. This book was so good I could have asphyxiated. It was perfect and intense and mind-boggling, and I haven’t felt so completely blown away by or invested in an ending since I read Ender’s Game. I cannot stress enough how well-written and unique ILLUMINAE is, how authentic it feels, how it carries such a big punch my poor little heart is still bruised. Both in formatting and in story, ILLUMINAE is a work of art. If I could, I would buy fifty million copies to line my walls as decoration. Obviously the sequel, GEMINA, cannot come out quickly enough. 

What about you, little coffee beans? Have you read ILLUMINAE? What are your thoughts? Have you ever read any books like it?