2016 // I Resolve

 

I realize this post is a little late, considering that normal people make and share their resolutions earlier on in the year (like, on day one). But since I am not a normal person, I have altered my schedule accordingly. So here you go, a list of my New Year’s resolutions (in no particular order):

I resolve to drink more coffee. Last year, I just, I don’t know, I don’t think I drank enough. Honestly, I didn’t quite put my heart and soul into it, and that needs to change. So, this year I plan to drink at least a small ocean’s worth of coffee.

 

I resolve to read more books. Admittedly, it’s been a long while since someone told me, “You read too much.” And I don’t think I have to tell you how unfortunate that is. Obviously, I’m not doing this right, and I need to try harder. I need to read until my brain is stuffed with words and lines of print start scrolling out my ears. Then, and only then, will I know that I have almost begun to read enough.

 

I resolve to learn more about the Black Death. Ever since I had to research the Bubonic Plague for a medieval history class, I’ve been obsessed with it. If you were to get me started, I could talk for hours about the physical and psychological effects of the disease, both on the individual and society as a whole. But I don’t think I would be able to teach a Ph.D. level course on it, and that needs to change. 

 

I resolve to eat more pizza. I really don’t think this point needs clarification.

I resolve to blog better. Lately I’ve been a little (translation: a lot) scatterbrained, and when you mix busyness with absentmindedness, it makes for an uncomfortable combination. Needless to say, I’d like to get ahead with blog writing so I’m not always scrambling last minute to finish my posts. Also, I have plenty of ideas, and I want to use them without stressing out and frying my brain.

 

I resolve to spend more time on other blogs. Seriously, I’ve been so bad at this for the past few months. (Really, I’ve been bad at it since day one, but if I just mention the past few months it makes me feel a little better about myself.) There are so many blogs out there, and so many posts I want to read and comment on, and this year I want to get better at doing that. Also, I don’t let myself answer comments on my blogs until I’ve commented on all the blogs I follow, which is why I’m often quite slow at getting back to you people. Oops.  

I resolve to become world-famous and super rich. Obviously, this means I will buy at least one Lamborghini, probably two (since I can’t decide if I want one in silver or lime green). I will buy so many books that the postal workers will build a new post office in my honor, funded by all the money that has been spent shipping book boxes to me. (WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING? That is totally a legitimate goal.) And I will also buy a thermos from the NaNoWriMo store because they’re super cool, and I’ve been wanting one since forever.

I resolve to become world ruler. Cait @ Paper Fury has her own plans for world domination, so this resolution may not be as straightforward as some of the others. But I’m confident we can come to a solution. Maybe I can rule most of the world and she can have New Zealand (because I like New Zealand, and I wouldn’t give it to just anyone).

 

I resolve to write words and then edit them. Again, this point doesn’t need explaining.

 

I resolve to become a New York Times Bestseller. Shhh, don’t tell me that’s not how it works. Just smile and nod, and I will give you coffee beans and call you my best friend.

 

I resolve to be more antisocial, more neurotic, and more morbid. Yep, this is the year for letting my true colors shine. Now go away.

 

Well, those are my resolutions, little coffee beans. What about you—what are your goals for 2016? When Cait and I battle for world domination, whose army will you join?